Where are the best lockers in unihigh?
By Emelie Ang & Violet white
The bell rings, a rush of students stomp past you, you make a beeline for the lockers. You approach a pack of people in the corridor and brace yourself for the impact. You’re a little boat bobbing along in a choppy ocean. Finally, after what seems like an eternity, you can escape the sea of people, the nearest person is no longer shoulder-to-shoulder with you.
You’re now impatient and eager to get to your locker, so you can, at last, put your books down, find your friends and dig into your lunch.
But to your utter disappointment, yet another swarm of people awaits you at your locker. There’s the bottom lockers, the lowest of the low, ducking under a flurry of limbs, cautiously shielding from any projectile books. Then there are the top lockers, the ones that flaunt their height, those who barge through those who cower underneath them. The middle locker occupants are only a fraction luckier than the rest.
When it comes to lockers, there’s good and bad ones. There's the sleepy, sluggish trek to the 300s first thing in the morning, to getting trampled by a stampede of bodies in the canteen, smothered by the smell of hormonal teenagers and home-packed lunches.
But the real question is, where’s the best place to have a locker?
In this article, we take a deep dive into the variety of lockers that Unihigh hosts. We’ll break them down and look at them for two different criteria:
Proximity (to classes, facilities, friends).
Function of the locker.
EBS Lockers
Proximity: 10/10
Function: 7/10
Overall: 9/10
Especially if you’re an EBS student, the location could not get any more convenient. You’re in close proximity to the increasingly popular bathrooms, your classrooms, and it's a flat walk to the canteen, so you couldn’t ask for more. Although on the smaller side, these lockers are each to their own, encompassing individuality, and giving its owner a sense of grounding attachment. Aesthetic and unique, these lockers could be considered the least draining out of them all, with only the upper-level occupants only needing to make a trip up some stairs first thing in the morning.
VCE Lockers
Proximity: 6/10
Function: 5/10
Overall: 6/10
We noticed these lockers are significantly smaller than others around the school, and when we opened one up we saw that they only had one small shelf at the top, compared to others which have one large shelf cutting through the middle. On top of being tiny, they are also quite an eyesore. The bright orange colour against the grey walls is not the most attractive sight. Although the VCE lockers take three exhausting stories to get to, they are a jump and a hop away from all the VCE classrooms, making them convenient for all the VCE students.
Under-the-stairs Lockers
Proximity: 9/10
Function: 6/10
Overall: 5/10
These large blue lockers are a rare sight at Uni High, with only a few scattered below the stairs in between the library. They are unusually sized for the school, with two shelves rather than one, resembling those from an American highschool movie. Their location makes them convenient to get to any area of the school, however when we opened them we saw a shocking sight. The lockers were not only full of dust, but full of rubbish too, simply in dismal states.
Canteen Lockers
Proximity: 9/10
Function: 7/10
Overall: 8/10
Boasting the largest congregation of lockers at Unihigh, they come in a variety of shapes and sizes. You’ll be safe to assume you’ll bump into numerous familiar faces as an occupant, with the majority of the school coming in and out of the doors of the canteen, for their lockers, the canteen, and to sit down and chill. However, it can be a blessing and a curse having a locker in such a high-traffic area, with a five-minute wait to reach your locker not unusual. These lockers make up the majority at Unihigh, clearly veterans of the school with unique doodles and tags over their doors and stacks of old worksheets and tests crammed into vacant spaces.
Locker Bay Next to Canteen
Proximity: 9/10
Function: 9/10
Overall: 9/10
Although a bit irrelevant and unbeknownst to many students at Uni High, this locker bay seems to have a homely, intimate feeling to it. With tasteful artwork on its back wall, this locker area boasts close proximity to numerous facilities without the high foot traffic that can be found in the canteen. There’s not much wrong with having a locker here, apart from the fact that it could get cramped during more busy times.
100s Lockers
Proximity: 5/10
Function: 2/10
Overall: 3.5/10
Cramped in a dingy corner in no-man's land, these lockers could not be in a more inconvenient location. Narrow and amidst the chaos and rush especially when the bell rings at 3 PM, the area around these lockers is a place where you’ll find yourself squeezing through bags and people, and stepping over discarded pieces of rubbish on the floor. We have no words other than these lockers are simply rank. We were also pleasantly surprised to see kiwifruit smeared over the lockers. No more words needed.